Local Girl Plans to Lose Virginity at Prom (2011)

Prom is the highlight of any teenager’s high school days, often leading to fond memories during a person’s midlife when they realize life didn’t turn out how they planned. Students spend the entire year, saving and awaiting this one night and at least one girl, plans to make the most of it.

“I’m gonna lose my virginity at prom” says eighteen year old, Chinpoko High Student, Jessica Marsh. “It’s gonna be so much fun. I’ve been planning it since Freshman year.”

Showing off her pink prom dress that she designed and made herself, she mentions how she always pictured the perfect moment that she would lose her virginity. “Every girl always dreams of that perfect moment, that she’ll have her first time and hopes it will be special. I’m no exception.”

When asked if there was one special boy she planned to give this gift to, she said “My dream has always been to lose it to the football team.”

Going into graphic detail that can’t be printed here, she laid out her whole night and how she hopes it will unfold. “Nothing can stop this perfect moment. Not even that stuck up bitch, Brittney Olsen” she said. “it’s gonna be magical. I can’t wait to have all those Cocks.”

“The Cocks” are Chinpoko High’s championship winning team and Jessica is hoping that they will enjoy the extra perks of winning the state championship this year. “I hope this means as much to them as it does to me.” She added, smiling.

The Kage Daily Sun reached out to the Chinpoko High “Cocks” for comment, and all we got where sly grins and everyone high fiving one another.

Asked about her plans for the future, she told me how she can’t wait for college. “I’m majoring in woman’s studies” She said. “It’s not science, but there’s gonna be a lot of experimenting, if you know what I mean.”

Brittney Olsen couldn’t be reached for comment.

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