All posts by Kage

A Chance I didn’t Take.

Writer’s Note* Wrote this as a school assignment when I was 22. Kind of old, but those who read it, enjoy it.

———

     There once was a chance I didn’t take. It was, oh, so long ago now. I was twenty-two and fresh out of college, when I met this beautiful woman, by the name of Allison. Allison was ten years my senior, but that didn’t matter to me. She had gorgeous ruby red lips, which resembled a fresh apple that commanded you sink your teeth into it. Her long auburn hair, which smelled of watermelon, and contrasted with her baby blue eyes, and had long sweet natural waves, that washed over her head like the sea against the beach on a clear, moonlight night. She had a little tattoo on her forearm, which was classy, more so than trashy. She could be the envy of any woman that might have had the misfortune to stand next to her.

     We met one night, after work, at the local bar. I all ready had a couple of drinks in me, and I was a bit tipsy. Thats’ when I turned around on the bar stool and saw her. I don’t know weather it was the alcohol or what, but I swear she had one of those slow motion entrances you only see in the movies. I fell out of my seat in front of her. She giggled and in a soft, tender voice, asked if I was all right. I pulled myself up, dusted off and said.”I’m fine” She gazed at me with a seductive look and said “You definitely are.” Now, I’m never one to be so bold, even when liquid courage is coursing its way through my veins, but in a low voice I managed to ask “Would you care to get out of here?” She said she would, then whispered in my ear. I grew excited and we left.

     Since I was all ready near inebriation, we took her car and headed to the local liquor store. I went in and grabbed the cheapest wine with the most expensive sounding name, so I could impress her and not break my wallet at the same time. I quickly paid for the wine and made a mad dash for the car. Allison peeled out of      the parking lot and we sped to the local park. Thankfully, no one was around, so we laid out a blanket she had in her trunk and shared the wine straight from the bottle. By this time I was fully smashed and ballsy to boot, so I kissed her. We proceeded to make out like two teenagers. But it must of been a mixture of the adrenaline and the booze, because I don’t remember what happened after that.

     I awoke the next morning in my bed, with a throbbing headache. My vision was slightly blurred, but I could still make out that the clock said 9:00 am. Being late for work, I had no time to change or shower, so I just went in with what I had on. As I entered work, my supervisor looked at me and said “Wild night, huh?” It must have been the smell of booze wafting off me, along with the ruffed up look of my clothes that tipped him off. I nodded to him, my head hurt to bad to speak.”Be sure to tell me all about it at lunch” he said. I nodded again in agreement and he went off on his way.

     The rest of the day went by slow. At about eleven, I was finishing off paper work at my desk, when I reached into my pocket to find a folded piece of paper. It was a note from Alison, which read “Call me tonight” and had her phone number on it. I quickly flipped open my cell phone and started to dial when I was interrupted by a delivery guy. He placed a package on my desk and handed me a clip board to sign. Thats when I noticed the tattoo on his forearm. The same koi fish. It looked to be the same tattoo Alison had. I was going to pass it off as mere coincidence, but curiosity got the best of me. As the delivery guy left, I punched in Alison’s number and hit send. At that same moment, the delivery guy answered his cell and a man’s voice answered on mine. I quickly hung up as fast as I could. Maybe it was a coincidence, but that was a chance I wasn’t going to take.

Sexually Liberated Woman vs The Slut

     There seems to be, at least to me, people confusing the idea of a sexually liberated woman and a slut as one and the same thing. This is just not true and is something that needed to be taken to task for a long time.

     I think these ideas of that just sleeping around is equality for woman, is something that is being passed onto younger females and it is a bad thing to be passing on. You’re teaching these girls that if men can sleep around, so can’t they. This argument isn’t logical and we don’t take the time to think about what it really means to be sexually liberated as opposed to being an outright slut.

     How often do you hear someone calling a woman a “slut”, when she may in-fact, not be one? A lot of woman use the term “slut” to denigrate other woman. Some use it as a greeting, much like black modified the dreaded N-word to great one another. Some use it as a joking poke: ”Oh, you’re such a slut” Granted, a lot of women oppose the idea of being a slut and some will even try to justify the behavior of a slut as a woman being “sexually liberated” yet, that isn’t true at all. We throw the term slut, around too lightly. Why, then, do we get riled up when our daughters grow up to become the later, rather than the former, all under the guise of being sexually liberated? Allow me to give you a clue as to what separates a slut, over the sexually liberated

     The slut, quite often, sleeps around and has many, many partners.The sexually liberated woman is one who may have had many partners in her past. So what separates the two? A little thing called personal responsibility. The sexually liberated woman exercises personal responsibility, where as the slut only exercises that hole between her legs.

     The sexually liberated woman will sleep with any man she wants or even none at all. The slut will also sleep with any man she wants. What is the difference? The Sexually Liberated woman will exercise discrimination, on who she sleeps with. The slut won’t discriminate and sleep with just about any man giving her attention.

     The sexually liberated woman uses condoms. She makes sure the man has one, and if not, she will provide her own. The slut is lucky if she even knows what a condom is, never mind how to use one.

     The Sexually liberated woman isn’t just looking for attention. She, like any man, desires physical pleasure as well. The slut will make out with anyone 10 feet from the closest camera. Remember, whores are not just whores in the bedroom; they are whores in all aspects of their lives, especially when it involves attention.

     The sexually liberated woman will get sexually transmitted infection testing every few months, to ensure her health and the health of her partners. If she is in a long lasting relationship, she may, of course, forgo these test, unless she has reason to suspect she might need one, do to her or her partners infidelity, or if they choose a swingers lifestyle, or some other valid reason. The slut thinks the STD test is something you have to take to get a job and is the equivalent to a high school diploma.

     The slut may go months, and months of unprotected sex, possibly accumulating many sexually transmitted infections along the way, and possibly infected many unsuspecting partners because of her own ignorance or her lack of respect for anyone she sleeps with, by just withholding the information back.

     We cannot blame the slut for passing all of the sexually transmitted infections in the world. We need to blame the man who didn’t exercise his personal responsibility by going for the quick piece of ass, rather than looking for better quality woman, who exercises her personal responsibility.

     Some more signs include:

     Where are you picking her up?
     If you’re picking her up in a bar, chances are someone you know did the same thing the night before. You won’t find sexually liberated woman making out with other sexually liberated woman in a club to shitty hip-hop to draw your attention to them. You’ll find them everywhere else, but clubs and bars. If you do happen come across one at the club, then that is a woman out of her element and you’re lucky or easily fooled.

     If you found her on Craigslist she is probably an emotional train wreck. These women are very dangerous. A lot of them are disgruntled over a past relationship, most likely, they are not fully over it yet and you’ll bear the brunt of it. Stay away, for sluts and emotional wrecks await ye at Craigslist.

     How many kids does she have?

     If the woman you are thinking about fucking has had a lot of kids, or does have a lot of kids, and the fathers vary, you’ll want to stay away. Sexually Liberated woman wouldn’t have a lot of children, and if they did, it wouldn’t be with multiple fathers, because they have respect for themselves and that is why they use caution with personal responsibility, to make sure unwanted pregnancy doesn’t happen. Yet, the slut may have many children, and usually, those kids are taken by the state, yet, they can’t keep their legs and continue to produce more offspring to make them feel better, entrap men and get free money from the system. The do not exercise personal responsibility at all, and you’ll be wise to stay far away from them.
Of course, the list could go on and on about the difference, but the best way to tell isn’t always by looking, but by a woman’s actions. If she appears to be irresponsible for her own actions, she will be this way in all her endeavors and you should stay away.

     Do you feel like your pee burns just from looking at her?

     If you can’t even look at a woman without your penis itching, or your pee burns just thinking of her, than you are in the presence of a bona fide slut, and not a sexually liberated woman. Congrats, you probably have aids now.

     In other words, sluts are men and sexually liberated woman are just that, woman.

Whip it, Whip it Good!

“Couples should explore their mutual fantasies.” There’s no such thing as a mutual fantasy. Yours bore us; ours offend you.”-Bill Maher

      BDSM is lame. I’m going to go out on a limb here and express something that–ever since the illiterate hack of a writer called E.L. James wrote 50 Shades of Crap–has become the hip thing all the kids were talking about.

      On a surface level, BDSM to most people seems to be about Dominate and Submissive persuasions. It’s actually a lot deeper than that, but for the sake of brevity, since I could write an entire book detailing all the little nuances of the culture, we’re going to leave it here. In BDSM you take on a role of either Master/Slave or Dominate/Submissive depending upon your preferred preference of role. They refer to it as taking on a role within the BDSM “Community.”In other words, you could be a Dominate guy, running a fortune 500 company by day and a submissive slave at night. Put even better in 1975, in the Rocky Horror Picture Show, “I’m not much of a man by the light of day, but by night I’m one hell of a lover.”

      I’m not casting judgment on this lifestyle and for many, it is just that. Let us be honest, it’s fucking nerdy! BDSM is on par with Live Action Role Playing. It’s Dungeons & Dragons, for “Adults.” Your mistress gets +12 at night and must roll a D20 for damage modifier to her whip.

      Look to nature, do you see Bucks wearing ass-less chaps? No, that’s because they don’t change roles, they’re static in their persuasion. BDSM is exclusively unique to humans and I think it’s because humans don’t quite understand dominance vs submission. They have rough ideas because of how warped society is and how religion has changed everything, effectively fucking humanity up.

      Rape is a horrible crime. Even in nature, no means no. I had a female pit bull for 10 years. She was a hard up lesbian. Anytime a male dog attempted to mount her, she would promptly move. If the dog didn’t take the hint, she would attack to protect herself. Does that sound like allowance of rape?

      There is a major difference from being a rapist and being a man. Masculinity, for those who don’t get it (I.E. woman and 99% of men) is not about rape. “Rape” is often tossed about as being a common fantasy of woman. Yet, when you read the description, it’s not even akin to rape at all. It’s something out of a stupid Harley-Quinn romance novel featuring Fabio on the cover, in a shirt that the front man of The Cure would rock for Gothic flavor.

 

      Men are intuitive, with luck. Not all are, but since the birth of humanity, one thing was certain, sex was most likely accomplished non-verbally. Hence why there are so many books on how to know if a woman is flirting with you. It’s in human

 

      nature and it didn’t go away just because we developed a language which allows for far more efficient communication. You can be a man and not be a rapist. It is quite easy, so long as you pay attention. What woman are really saying, but lack the ability to verbalize is not rape, but passionate, strong, aggressive sex.

      Getting back to the topic at hand on BDSM, is it any wonder that it catches on in a society with a childlike understanding of sexual persuasions? Scratch that, because one look at a schools structure and how children group will show a much better understanding of those persuasions. There are leaders, followers and uncategorized. They don’t just extend to sex.

      Dominance is no more a role than being a gender is an identity. It’s something that is innate and cannot be faked by people who aren’t. Whips, chains, dog collars and pleather jackets, (because to rock real leather would be harming animals and the pseudo-dominate couldn’t allow that, could they?) are not dominate.

      Leather doesn’t make you dominate, fuck, it doesn’t make you anything. Try making it yourself, instead of buying a machine made, Chinese lead filled, cheap piece of shit. Does wearing elves ears make me a Vulcan? Nope and it doesn’t extend anywhere else, either. You either are or you’re not, but you can play the role as so many do in this lifestyle. Emphasis on the play.

      Going back to 50 Shades of Grey, which isn’t about a dominate male and a submissive woman, but rather about a scared little boy who wants total control over everything, including woman. Security is a hallmark of men. Woman seek it and men need to have it and that doesn’t need to mean money or status, since status is so varied that it will depend on a woman’s preference.

      How does BDSM fit into that? It doesn’t. It’s all up to the individual to do what’s right for them, but one thing is for sure, BDSM and 50 Shades of Grey are not, nor will it ever be legit dominance. My personal understanding of a dominatrix, is that it is something woman do, in order to be more actively engaged in sex. Nature kind of decrees that they’re usually in a more passive role, during the sex. This is wholly understandable, yet I will never understand why men are drawn to it. It’s on par with studying masculinity. If you have to study masculinity, you’re probably not too much of a man, anyways and that’s fine, nature needs you as well. Don’t attempt to be “Alpha.” Anyone with a brain knows this type of guy just doesn’t exist. You can be masculine and great with woman and not be the top dog. In some cases, that “Alpha” guy is taking it in the ass from his boyfriend, if he happens to be gay. Yes, they exist on both sides of sexuality.

      If you know a thing or two about programing, you know Alpha testing is the shit phase. That’s when you work out all the kinks out and figure out how to fix them. In other words, your alpha phase should be childhood and by your teen years, you should have a much better grasp on yourself as a person and your likes and dislikes.

      Best way to be dominate in the bedroom? Be active in the sex and not passive. That is being dominate. Direct the traffic and take some chances. If something doesn’t work, she’ll express herself and you can stop doing as such. It doesn’t make you less of a man to have respect for any human, regardless of gender.

      Think with the right head and you’ll be fine.

Postscript:Cleaned up the article a bit, made a few minor errors, which are now corrected.

EDITED 9/08/18 TO REMOVE PICTURES IN THIS ARTICLE, DUE TO NOT FORMATTING RIGHT.

A Prespective on the Marijuana Movment

    The greatest detriment to the Marijuana legalization movement is not the plant itself, and not even so much the stigma and falsehoods perpetuated against the plant. It is none other than the smokers themselves that ruin the cause.

;     Think back to when Michael Phelps got busted in a picture smoking a bong, what was the first thing he said after-wards? How smoking it was a mistake. No, it wasn’t a mistake that you smoked it, your mistake was getting caught and you wanted to protect your endorsements…and yet, no one cared you toked up, because people’s perceptions of weed itself is changing.

    If we can photograph celebrities smoking a cigar or having a few cocktails and not care, why can’t we also do the same for a bong hit?

    We need more Bill Maher, and Michael Phelps types to come out and say they smoked Marijuana and that they enjoyed it, and it should be legal. Instead, we get stuck with people like Tommy Chong, who, to his credit is a great comedian, but no one takes him seriously.

    If a Nobel prize winner,scientist or billionaire came out and said “I smoke dope” people would look at smokers in a whole new light; that those of us who enjoy marijuana are not smelly hippies with nasty dreadlocks, reciting Bob Marley lyrics ad nausem , who have an I.Q. below that of wet paint.

    If you were dressed in a suit and tie and worked for a fortune 500 company and said told someone you smoke Marijuana, they probably be stunned. Mainly, because some peple have this notion that all pot smokers are stupid, dirty hippies and they are not. They now have to re-assess what they think they know about Marijuana and its smokers. Getting people to think is a positive thing in the Marijuana legalization movement.

    Joe Rogan, comedian and former host of Fear Factor, gave his story about Marijuana and his first time with it. He used to abstain from smoking it, because all his “stupid” friends smoked it, then he met a top flight martial artist and saw that it wasn’t morons and losers who toke up, productive people could, too!

    Weed doesn’t create losers and morons, it just exacerbates the symptoms all ready present. If you are a loser without dope, you’ll most likely be one with it. Same goes for the likes of other drugs, like alcohol as well. Of course, you get your wild cards, were, ironically, the person is actually more productive when they are not sober, but those are few and far between, I believe.

    I deplore the idea of sacrifice for a cause, but some of us, mainly celebrities, have a podium an average guy like me doesn’t have. Admitting to smoking dope doesn’t get an actor fired; it gets him on the cover of Time magazine. All press is good press when you are famous. Look at Brittney Spears, who goes insane and is now on a comeback role.

    If you are someone who can break the stereotype of the stupid stoner and perpetuate a new image, one of a smart, productive member of society, then you should do so, so long as it will not bring grief to your normal life.

   The Marijuana movement, I think, would be better off with 500 productive members of society, like Michael Phelps, then 5,000 well intentioned hippies protesting for the repeal of Marijuana prohibition.

    The continued debate cannot continue to be all about how marijuana is a safer alternative to a substance like alcohol. We know that now and we continue to tell people the truth, from the lies that have surged through the Marijuana movement. Now it is time to change the way people perceive us, as a collective of individuals, not a culture of wastrels looking to Turn on, tune in and drop out, but rather a group of eclectic individuals who prefer the alternative.

Sources:

Joe Rogan interview:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMLSyOMiYd4

Micheal Phelps interview:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-cilWSl6T2s

Lets Talk About Rape.

1
: an act or instance of robbing or despoiling or carrying away a person by force
2
: unlawful sexual activity and usually sexual intercourse carried out forcibly or under threat of injury against the will usually of a female or with a person who is beneath a certain age or incapable of valid consent — compare sexual assault, statutory rape

3
: an outrageous violation

     This article is about rape. You didn’t ask for it and you don’t want it, but I’m forcing it upon you anyways. Besides, you know you want it. Those eyes scream yes, even if your mouth says no

     Why would I rape the unsuspected reader? Because I get off on the power of knowing that I can get away with it. I mean, after all, what did you do to protect yourself from me? You put yourself in this situation and besides, look at what you’re wearing. What did you expect to happen? I was provoked and had no other options.

     Shhhh! It’s ok, it will all be over soon…for me, anyways. Your story is just beginning and this is merely a catalyst for a life time of learning to trust and live with yourself. You’ll be transported to the hospital and given all sorts of test. They’ll want to make sure you were legitimately raped and then they’ll check you for sexually transmitted diseases and infection. A pregnancy test will be needed, just in case. Next, it will go viral and everyone will know you were raped. So begins the public scrutiny. Did he or didn’t he? Was she drinking? How come she didn’t do more to protect herself? Nude pictures from your phone will surface, only whores do those types of things. Common sense dictates that if you want that to be private, you shouldn’t take those types of chances. Your friends will shun you, because I couldn’t possibly do that kind of thing. He’s too nice and caring, they’ll say. You’re not even attractive enough to be raped, anyways. Only good looking people are raped. The worse part? You won’t even remember the assault, because I drugged you. After all, real victims remember, don’t they?

     Finally, when all is said and done, I’ll be exonerated and you’ll have to live knowing that I’m still out there. It was all you. If only you had been smarter. Why are you so fuckin’ stupid and pathetic? Psychologically beat yourself up, you know you deserved it anyways. Maybe you can escape the pain by killing yourself. Who would miss a fuckin’ whore, anyways?

     Feeling violated, yet? I’m not even kidding when I write the above. I write a lot of things, one of which is humor, but the words above shouldn’t be taken in jest. You were just raped. Sure, virtual rape doesn’t seem like “legitimate” rape, but read the definition again and know that it is, indeed, rape. I violated you with my words.

     I’ve violated you and now you can be sympathetic or empathic to those who have gone through rape. Why did I choose to start off a serious, but legitimate article by raping the reader? Good question. Why does rape happen to begin with? As I stated, I did it because I could, it’s a power trip. While rape is usually about power, it isn’t always done by a stranger. In fact, most rapes occur by trusting individuals.

     The old adage, if you don’t want to get raped, don’t be alone, doesn’t apply when you trusted the person for ages. Sure, if you’re out alone, it helps to have some protection handy, but that won’t protect you from your friend, counselor, doctor or other trusted individual from taking liberties with you. Besides, who was in the room as you clicked the link? How did that protect you from me?

      Did your looks matter? Didn’t prevent me from doing what I did. Even your gender didn’t help. Yes, even men can be raped. All different sexualities, even.

     Look at what you are wearing now. Did that conservative get up prevent me from the above?

      What was the point of all this? To create an awareness of rape, allow people to read the typical bullshit that is thrown at the victim and to understand in a way few can.

     So if you know anyone who has been raped, or you yourself have been a victim of sexual violence, then you need to seek help. Never be afraid to speak up for yourself or someone else. You could be the difference in preventing sexual violence. Don’t let anyone silence you.

     For more information on rape, visit these links:

     https://rainn.org/

Young Man Destroys Establishment.

AP-United States

     It was just spouse to be another day at the office for John Pearson, but it turned out to be historical for both him and his home country.
Born in small town New England, John Person left the simple life in pursuit of his dream of being a full time journalist.

      “I wanted to be a journalist for years.” John Pearson said. “I can recall back, being as young as five years old and interviewing people using my handy-dandy notebook from Blue’s Clues. “ He pulled out the tattered old notebook, showing the scribbling of his youth. “I didn’t grow up enjoying the greats, like Prez Hilton as my peers did. Instead, I turned to little known journalist, like Christopher Hitchens, in order to hone my craft.”

     You might be wondering who John Pearson is and why he is all over the place. He is the young man who has written a technically sound news article. He remembered the who, what, when, where and why. Did his own fact checking and didn’t alter one quote that was said to him. I’m surprised this is news. John solemnly said. I was just doing my job.

     In today’s modern world of sound bites, salacious headlines that have nothing to do with the actual article and TMZ style reporting, a young man like John would be considered too traditional to work for any major publication. Only his second article, his first being about a couple of gay Squirrels getting married, he has reason to not let it go to his head.

     “You know, I only have these two stories under my belt, so let’s see if I can continue to be the journalistic Jesus that the media is making me out to be.” He chuckled and then reminded me that journalist don’t actually get to pick the stories they will be covering and need to make a living just like any other American.

     “It’s not as if I’m going to win the Murrow award for this piece.” He added. “I have some real competition. Did you see the piece about Paris Hilton stumbling from the bar? You cannot compete with journalistic heavy-weights writing about the things Americans truly care about.”

     Indeed, John is spot on. So young and humble. We here at Best in your Girl have no doubt that John will continue to improve the journalistic landscape, one article at a time. He is already onto his next piece entitled Living with cancer at five years old.

     “I know it’s nothing, but it’s interesting to me and I just know someone out there will enjoy the piece just as much as I do. I figured with the major success I’ve garnered, perhaps they’ll cut me some slack with this next one.”

     We look forward to reading the piece and keeping you up to date on John’s career.

     Update: John did, in fact, receive a Murrow award nomination. Losing to the Paris Hilton article he cited.