Tag Archives: opinon

Writing

Why it’s ok to think your partner is ugly.

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I know I’ll catch a bit of shit for this, but I have a valid reason for it.

You won’t always find your partner attractive and that’s normal and natural. It’s how you engage and act after thinking that, that really matters and here is why.

So, we’re evolutionary prone to stay away from things that hurt us. Disease, being one of the major things. You’re learned from Covid that quarantines sometimes work. We learned this in childhood when our parents had us stay in our bedrooms to prevent other family members from getting sick.

What’s one way our parents or friends noticed. “You don’t look so good” is normally what is said, or something similar to this.

So even though your partner isn’t Family by blood, unless you’re from Kentucky, they’re still a loved one. Especially when you have kids involved.

So it’s more than permissible to find your partner to be unattractive from time to time. Especially when they’re sick. It’s a natural trait of human empathy to want to see the sick in an unflattering light, ironic though it may be.

Think of the novel Lolita. Humbert makes poor Delores put out, even when she’s sick. A human being cares for their partner and puts them first. They’re more than just a vagina or dick.

Thinking your partner to be unattractive actually presents you in a flattering way, instead of narrasstic. however, like above, tactful presentation is key.

Think of the 2008 campaign trail where John McCain got shit on for leaving his first wife with cancer and rightfully so. That’s a rather poor way of going about it. I know it’s easy for me to say, given the whole I’ve been single for years, however being a serial monogamist gives you no more special knowledge than a dude that set out being a CAD.

However, much like your partner and you, this is not about one single individual, rather it’s about the idea behind being selfless in selfishness. Oxymoronically though it may be, there can be far less conceit in selfishness than selflessness.

I’ve pointed out before that a child between two people act as a blood bond, a sacrament and as such, makes your partner equal to family.

However, since you’re not genuinely blood, there isn’t the same need to stay with said partner in today’s day and age. However, you both develop independent needs to protect said child or children. That’s a selfish concept. You give your kids what you can, because it pleases you, the individual to give to them. Like with all things in life, context is key to understanding.

This brings me back to the topic at hand, which is to say that finding your partner unattractive may seem selfish in the sense people try to tie the word to anything negative, however, wouldn’t you be better off acknowledging that feeling instead of being insecure that it makes you seem negative? What’s more selfish in that regard?

I’m against morality as a concept, because I see it as childish. However, I do believe in right from wrong and that we have 4 biological imperatives. The 4th is the most no shit Sherlock thing ever, I almost never include it and leave it to the three major ones. Don’t rape, don’t steal, don’t kill and the 4th is don’t incest.

Finding your partner ugly doesn’t count as one of the major four, so it’s regaled to basic right from wrong. It’s never wrong to think things through. Bad thoughts are not tantamount to bad actions.

It’s good to have a fantasy outside of your partner for instance. Porn is good for giving you an ethical “cheat card” to think of someone that isn’t your partner as an option. cheating would be the worse option.

Thinking your partner unattractive is the same as the above.

Remember, sometimes love requires asymmetrical trains of thought. It’s not criminal to find your wife or girlfriend unattractive from time to time, it is however horrible to dump them for not living up to a bullshit standard you can’t even live up to 24 hours a day.

Stay metal 🤘

Writing

Why I’m in favor of political violence in a post Charlie Kirk world.

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There is a huge difference between civil unrest and political violence. Martin Luther King Jr’s assassination wasn’t political violence, it was civil unrest. Abe Lincoln’s death wasn’t political violence, it was civil unrest. I know civil unrest sounds like I’m down playing the deaths, however, historically political violence has been known as war. While war should be scarce, it’s historically done us good. Revolutionary war, the civil war, world war 2. Without political violence we would all be goose stepping and speaking German.

However trite civil unrest sounds, it’s vastly downright from war. Civil unrest is when you get a tough climate and tensions rise within. Sometimes the catalyst for war itself, however, that’s isn’t always true.

Charlie was a martyr for Christian values or conservatism, he was assassinated for ego and valuation. Charlie clearly wasn’t a Hitler in training and attempting a political overthrow, he was a father and a husband that wanted the best for his children.

However, he is a martyr for stupidity. Ivory tower dumb fucks we call millennial, with 80s yuppie entitlement issues that seem to think they in the midst of a war, like it’s the 1960s. To compare the two would be an egregiously ignorant thing. Blacks were oppressed in the 60s, along with other minorities. There isn’t any way to hide it. What do we have now but micro disagreement. I’ve said this in my 20s and I’ll repeat it in my 40s, you can’t compare civil rights to the gay marriage movement. Sammy Davis jr couldn’t hide his skin, and while I disagree with the idea that gays should have to be closeted, such was far from real repression. Real repression is when you’re a homosexual college student and you get dragged by the back of a truck for no reason like Matthew Shepherd.

Trans “rights” is not a real issue , they’re just trading one set of rights for another.

Gay marriage isn’t a real issue , because love is more important than people giving a fuck about you.

Blacks and other minorities have been integrated into society for 60 something years, they’re not repressed.

The palatines aren’t repressed, you’re anti Semitic and need to grow up.

What we do have a real issue with is the looming threat of a third world war among other real issues going

The only thing Charlie’s death did, was reveal a bigger overall narrative of mental health issues among the millennial cohort than ever before.

Let’s start focusing on real issues again. As a line from one of my favorite scenes says

“we can’t be consumed with our petty differences anymore.” -President Witmore Independence Day

My condolences to Charlie’s family, friends and fans.

Stay metal 🤘

Writing

Is it Real Celebrity or a Facade?

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So social media is pretty fuckin old now. Facebook is twenty, X formerly Twitter is approaching it and the various other forms are catching up.

So, I didn’t grow up a social media native like the Gen Z youth did. Back in my, social media was something like a book, roller dex or who you worked with.

Now with that in mind, these platforms have various ways of “verifying” you. The “celebrity” checkmark as I’ve called it over the years or other identifying marks aren’t necessarily as real as they seem.

For instance, when I started Bestinyourgirl I paid to promote the facebook page and got like 300 or so likes before I ended the campaign. I looked at the engagement rate for it. That page never got and engagement, so I stopped using it entirely because it wasn’t worth posting to, with nothing happening.

My X account got some engagement, but it was mostly non followers. The followers of which I got were mostly fake Japanese accounts with the egg and kanji.

The engagement rate just wasn’t there.

I’ve deleted my instagram account multiple times over the years because instagram has a child fetish that upsold me dozens of very young modeling pages. So I can’t speak to any real engagement back then.

However, I’ve paid enough attention to Hollywood, Wrestling and other accounts and noticed a pattern a couple of years in. Legit engagement is 10 or so likes per 100 followers. So if you take the cap of 2 million or so followers that most of the legit celebrities have, albeit some exceptions like Pewdie pie, by the time you reach that barometer, you have about a quarter million or so legit “fans” that actively engage with your social platforms.

The rest are just for show and can be regaled to the wannabe aera of obscurity where most people still belong, including most celebrities.

However, I would say if This formula is accurate, a better label might be a purple label, since fans and a passion color would indicate a more accurate barometer of why they’re following your account.

Bestinyourgirl for instance wouldn’t fall under this banner as it was always intended as “unbrand” and I’ve set the tone for that over the years. However, since we’re on the subject, my preferred verification mark for this would be 🖕

Which for those paying attention, was the original logo for this to begin with.

The OG logo

Regardless of whether or not any of this holds merit, stay metal 🤘

Essays, Opinion, Writing

Dare to Be Stupid

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     Ultimately, we’re a social species and our main goal is almost always winning people over, no matter the area. The most major fear of not attempting to engage yourself in a favorite pastime is rejection. People don’t like to be rejected, for most people, it hurts, but for me, I thrive on rejection when it is combined with an understanding as to why I was. I love honestly and while I don’t need feedback, I am quite able to improve myself with no help, not everyone is like me.

     There is nothing wrong with rejection in and of itself. Criticism should never be dismissed as “Hater’s gon hate!” when we might be able to gleam an insight into how we might improve ourselves on a daily basis, provided say criticism has merit. Its way too easy to say “You suck!” and get a plethora of up votes or views on Youtube, retweet on Twitter or like’s on Facebook. These people are considered trolls, but sadly troll is thrust upon any level of criticism that doesn’t jibe with what the receiver desires. Just like no one likes to be rejected, no one likes to be intellectually refuted either and the stubborn are excessively likely to cling to their abject delusions in the face of evidence, valid argument or anything that pops that bubble they live in.

     I think the best way to live is to court failure and rejection like it’s the high school prom queen. Crave it, desire it and make it your bitch. Don’t be subjected to being its slave by being fearful of it. The best way to get over rejection? Find the rejection of that which you fear most and kick that fear in the teeth. Say you had a crush on a celebrity when you were a kid. You’re almost certainly going to be rejected by the person. How does that impact your value though? It doesn’t impact your value and it sure as hell isn’t bad for you. Maybe your ego takes a hit, but big deal. I want anyone reading this to go out and intentionally get rejected by the thing you want most. Be it a job, a person, or otherwise. Once you have had the worst level of rejection you could experience, everything else is a cake walk. You should never fear rejection again after such a loss, nor should you take anything overly personal again. Nothing could possibly be worse than rejection from that which you crave most and it never means you couldn’t attempt it again later on.

     How many people get fired from WWE only to find themselves back again? Don’t you think that the foremost wrestling company rejecting you, if you grew up watching their product, would sting? In some cases yes in other cases, maybe not. Why care what someone else thinks of you? Improve, and keep improving. Don’t just try to be the best, actually be the best. Study what works and why it works. Be it dating, a job or otherwise. Nothing is holding you back. Just remind yourself about my favorite saying, “any idiot can do this.” Well, I’m any idiot and so are you! To borrow from Weird AL, “Dare to be stupid.”

     When you dare to be stupid and have no fucks to give about rejection or anything else, many doorways will open up to you. Give it a try, because I’m any idiot and you are too, so dare to be stupid, we’re all waiting for you!