I’ve spent the majority of my life not popular, and I’m very thankful for that. I never understood the concept of people wanting this as a thing. It’s one thing to be liked by people you have a mutualism with. It’s one thing to not want to make enemies either. However, the excess frequency of which people desire to have throngs of people liking them made no sense to me. I mean, relevant means something integral to the proceedings. Which means most celebrities are irrelevant on a daily basis. Why would anyone care about a random weirdo on the internet and even follow them with nothing in it for them?

I know people say, that’s easy to say, but not many have genuinely walked the path of resistance like I have. Here’s an interesting story.

Social media didn’t exist and back in my teen years, I lived up north from Biddeford and joined the high school. Upon joining the school, I was met with an accidental task, put a bully in his place. I did that and was apparently rewarded with social acceptance or popularity. Nothing like coming home and having the next door neighbor, also the landlord, talk about how I’m the buzz of social circles. Apparently because full grown adults have nothing better to do than talk about teenagers in the 2003 era.

Compared to other schools I went to, where such made you a bigger target, this was different.

So cool, right? Well, no. It was worthless. Compared to when I wasn’t liked by anyone. I made almost no money at anything I tried to make money at. I could not find a job, and this was a aera with zero opportunity , so it’s more intelligent insulting to hear “something will come up.” I was 17, my adulthood was about to start. Not something I wanted to hear at that point. Shit, I wasn’t even invited to parties I wasn’t going to go to anyways. Instead of it just being because we don’t like each other, it’s because I’m more introverted, according to them. To which I was like “No shit, I said that.”

Ironically, I got even less pussy options than I normally get for being disliked. Oh, I was considered attractive, but nothing like most just ignoring you in general. I had like 3 chicks that went to that school, that liked me enough for us to attempt something. one was a Christian that like my Elvis impression and that was probably the most interesting part of those three.

The best option I had up there was a woman who hung out with the sister of my sister’s sister. But her friend, who was also into me, pretty much banned her from being around me. Not a way to get on my good side. Apparently that girl became a low level model or something. I was told by the chick that banned her around me, years later.

So how’s that to the start to adulthood? This is what idiots I went to school with coveted? This is why they wore the same clothes as others to “fit in?” To not get laid? To not make money? What the fuck type of life is this? Needless to say, nothing went anywhere with anything. Not a horrible tradgy when you factor in there was nowhere to take a chick anyways. I spent most my time hanging with a 25 year old and his 18 year old friend playing cards.

Wasn’t popularity the thing that was supposed to be the opposite of this?

This is not how my life had normally gone, up til then. Shit at one point in my life, different area, they threatened to expel me from school for non conformity. I took them up on the offer. in essence, selling my soul for rock and roll. I digress though.

I would later meet some of the kids that went to that high school in a different aera and it turns out, they were confirming to Gen X/Gen Z style “personalities” and was weird, for them, to find out my personality aspects were genuine.

This is all relevant to a future article, I swear, however it’s important to note that this is why few things ever make sense to me and why I write. I need to make sense of a world that has never been intended for a man like myself. It makes zero sense. I may or may not be the only one that sees the insanity, but hey, that is life.

All I know is that infamy, seems to be the better gig in this world and maybe because you can’t spell infamous without “I’m Famous.” or maybe it’s because it forces these bitches to be real for once.

Either way, stay metal! 🤘