Category Archives: Non-fiction

Essays, Link Dump, Non-fiction, Opinion, retro

Retro Appetizer! (2008-2010)

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Here is a bunch of short blog post, in their original format, under their original pen names and everything I did in that era, which were not articles, but with more to come.

John Edwards Cheats

“Cats and dog’s living together, mass hysteria”-Bill Maury “Ghostbusters”

http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/08/08/edwards.affair/index.html

You mean, under that very expensive hair cut, John Edwards is *GASP!* HUMAN! Oh my God! What is the world coming to when a human being makes a mistake and does something that goes along with their carnal nature? *shock, horror*

Who would have thought that a human being was anything short of infallible? Clearly not those who are reading this story on Edwards.

There is no way he could possibly, ever run a country now because he cheated on his wife.

Oh, woe is he who would vote for a man on his credentials on running a country and not on his sex life. Edwards should never run for president ever in the near future, because this is simply too much to bare. it warps my entire worlds view.

Anyone willing to discount a person from being president based on his personal life, especially after they elected a Jesus freak, ex coke head to office, needs to be shot.

Man Has Kid
Just because you changed your sex to become a man, does not make your pregnancy a “miracle”

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23942218/

A woman who had a sex change 10 years ago to become is now “pregnant”.

News flash! Getting a sex change, but keeping the female reproductive system you where born with, cause you were a woman to begin with, doesn’t count.

Sadly, idiots like to feed into a person like this who is just looking for attention and publicity. In a different article she was even quoted, I believe, as saying that she liked the fact this would generate controversy and mess with taboo’s.

I don’t think we should even consider this news worthy to begin with.

Show me a Man who was actually born a man, and who can get pregnant and I will show you a true miracle. Til then, file this under “Retarded attention whores”

Change?
America needs to stop deluding itself that is has made Change. Fact is, America has not made change and probably will not make real change for a long, long time. Sure people will say But we elected a black man to the highest office in our nation Yet we are so quickly ready to forget that Obama is half white. What does that speak of about our country? That we will elect someone, but only if he is half white? What if Obama was totally black, would our nation still have elected him, or would we have snubbed him based on race? What if Obama was totally white? Would he still have clinched his parties nomination?

How can we pride ourselves on making Change when in the same night, a state, who voted overwhelmingly to elect a man who is half black to our nations highest office, also voted against gay marriage in the same night?

America: We want change, but not THAT much change.

CUNT OF THE YEAR AWARDS
Well, who could possibly be the biggest cunt of 2009 before it is even over?

Daniel Petric, 17 of Ohio. This piece of shit killed his mother and his father, while they were in bed, then tried to make it look like a murder suicide and pin it on his father, all because they took his Halo game away from him. Oh, cry me a river fuck face.

They gave the little shit 23 years to life with parole. They say it isn’t fully his fault, because he was young and the video game influenced him.

FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU!!!

This video game made him do it shit is fucking lame as hell. That is just as bad as saying the Devil made you do it. You have no one to blame but yourself, fuck face! Stop scapegoating shit and own up and take fucking responsibility.

They should of gave you LIFE, if not killed you. You are so fucking Ohio didn’t give you the death penalty, if they even have it.

I hope you enjoy taking black dick for 23 years, because you are going to be filled out like an application.

I also hope every night before you go to bed, you see your mothers face and you are haunted for the rest of your fucking life.

“At the trial, Mark Petric testified that his son came into the room and asked his parents: “Would you guys close your eyes? I have a surprise for you.”
The father testified that he expected a pleasant surprise. Then his head went numb from a gunshot.”-THOMAS J. SHEERAN Yahoo News

Article on the douche bag

EDIT: We have a two way tie for biggest cunt of 2009;Tyler Weinman, ladies and gentleman, the “alleged” Florida cat killer. fuck you, too, you stupid cunt!

Calling a spade a spade

What the hell is up with the term “Sex offender”? It is so broad and vague. Is a sex offender someone who offends the opposite sex?

Why can’t we just toss political correctness to the side and call a spade a spade?

Lets call a child molester what he is, a fucking child molester. No special names for what they are. Same goes for pedophiles, rapist, dog fuckers and other people that end up on the “offender” list.

Don’t vague it up in an attempt to hide what these people did and give them some semblance of a normal life.

Do we call Serial Killers “Multiple life removers”? No, we don’t. Why cut corners here?

The term sex offender is also a form of scare tactics on suburban life. When you distribute fliers about how a “sex offender” lives next door to you, you are inciting fear in everyone nearby, because they jump to the conclusion that a “sex offender” is automatically a child molester.

Why should Holly house wife have to live in fear,–which passes onto her kids, because kids can feel their parents fear–when you can just straight shoot with us?

I’m not going to worry if Joe Dog Rapist is living 20 feet from a school zone. I do care when Ron Pedophile/Child rapist is, though.

Sure we can just look the person up on the list and see how he offended…but if we can find that out anyways, why not just tell us?

In fact, I think that all “sex offenders” should legally be forced to change there last name to reflect there crimes so there is no mistake about who they are and what they did.

Lets see Ron Pedophile hide from his crimes now.

Letter to the Editor

What happened to a time when people who committed the crimes where responsible for what they did? It appears those times are gone, as the local 7-11 is trying to stop things before they even happen, in an attempt to thwart some crimes.

See, if you are a certain age or below you get carded for cigarettes, and I am all for being carded; keeping minors from buying cigarettes/alcohol is a good thing, but potentially stopping me from making a purchase because I have someone with me who may or may not be a minor is just plain idiocy.

I am an individual, and what I do has nothing to do with anyone but me. You cannot assume I am going to commit a crime before I am even out the door, and if I do commit a crime once I am outside, then the responsibility goes to me and me alone.

It is not 7-11’s job to make judgment calls about what might happen.

If we’re going to start trying to predict crimes, why don’t they stop selling alcohol to anyone to drives to 7-11 with a car? After all, each person who buys alcohol and then gets into their car could be a drunk driver with the ability to harm others, could they not? Might as well go the full nine yards with this one, right?

Does 7-11 also extend this policy of double carding to parents who purchase tobacco or booze in the presence of their children? After all, children are most likely to get tobacco or alcohol from their parents than any other source around. Ask someone who started smoking or drinking at a young age and I bet you are most are apt to find that they were getting it from a parent’s stash as opposed to getting some stranger to buy them alcohol or tobacco. (To answer my own question posed above, 7-11 does not double card parents who are with their children. My mother was able to purchase alcohol and we were told only one of us need be carded and it didn’t matter which.)

The irony to this story is that while 7-11 is hassling young people in a vain attempt at stopping crime, they are also one of the biggest perpetrators of another crime, the use of Marijuana. They guise their sale of “Blunt wraps” under the cover of tobacco use only, but unlike the water pipe that has tobacco use roots in the Middle East and traditional Zig-Zag rolling papers which are used for roll your own cigarettes, blunt wraps are clearly meant for rolling weed in. Some come with names that are associated with Marijuana or carry pictures of popular hip-hop stars that are known to have smoked the illegal substance.

What pillars of the community, uh?

-William

Sex for Dummies?
Right, so what is the dumbest “for Dummies” book one could think of? If you said “Nuclear bomb buliding for dummies” well, you’re prob right. What is the second dumbest? “Sex for dummies” (Yes, this book is real) Honestly, how stupid does one have to be to read this book? What the fuck would it even look like anyways?

Chapter one:
Remove your clothes (Socks optional)

Chapter two:
Wrong hole dummy, aim higher

Chapter three:
The Promised land

Chapter four:
PULL OUT! PULL OUT!

Chapter five:
Oops! Where to find the morning after pill

Chapter six:
She wasn’t laughing at you…ok, maybe she was.

Chapter seven:
Don’t panic, that’s why we have penicillin.

Chapter eight:
Condoms. (Maybe we should have put this chapter in front of the book)

Chapter nine:
She told me she was eighteen. (and a 101 other excuses)

Chapter 10
Other things you could have bought besides this book.

Essays, Non-fiction, Opinion, retro, Writing

FUCK NERD CULTURE (2009)

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Starwars sucks. There, I said it. I just commited the highest blasphemy in geek history. My cpu will be sent trojans (unforuntly not condoms, cause a Starwars fan has never known a womans touch) Dorks will camp outside my house for months just to get a chance to hit me with there plastic TOY sabers. The anti-christ will come forth to cause destruction and cats and dogs will be living together. Mass hysteria!

Now, with that said, I will not overlook the contributions that Starwars has given to the cinema. Without Lucas and ILM making Starwars, who knows where movie special fx would have went. Would we have a lot of our beloved movies we have today, had Starwars not come first? Prob. not. We also have it to partily thank for Kevin Smiths career. Kevin Smith is awesome, but I digress.

I highly doubt there is a Starwars fan among you that can say they, at one point or another, have not been fed up with the “holy trilogy”. Even bored by it. How many times has Lucas messed with the oringal flims? How about how bad Episodes 1 and 2 sucked? the only reason people liked 3 was to see the return of Vader. Hardly Worth suffering through Jar Jar binks for.

Starwars has become too mainstrem for its own good. Everyone is a Starwars fan now. Part of being a geek is liking the obscure. Things others don’t find cool, we do.

This goes double for you fantasy loving geeks out there. Lord of the Rings SUCKS! Those are the most blatlenty homo-erotic movies ever concived. While the books might be good, the movies are boring and GAY! Just because you’re the grandfather of all fantasy, doesn’t mean everything about you is awesome.

While I am at it, Horror needs a kick in the nuts. Its all the same. Saw movies SUCK! Hostel movies SUCK! PG-13 horror SUCKS! J-horror SUCKS! Remakes SUCK! Zombie movies and fans, SUCK! I ain’t even talking about Rob here, I am talking about movies about zombies. Zombies are the worst monsters ever, stop holding them up on a pedestal, RETARDS!

Following this suit, Freddy, Jason, Micheal, Chucky and Pinhead, need to stay DEAD! Freddy is a joke. Jason is boring. Micheal gets raped by shitty musicans who think they can direct, and the Hellrasier movies, while they all suck to begin with, don’t even involve Pinhead anymore.

Horror just plain sucks now. It’s fun while your a kid, but it soon loses it luster after you realize how they’re all the same movie, repacked to be sucked up by the idiot public.

RPG’s are DUMB! D&D sucks. So don’t you if you have discussions about how your broad soward gets +7 damage if cast at night and other retarded things. The only decent RPG is prob Vampire the Requiem and other White Wolf games.

If you’re one of those losers that plays any RPG all day, and I don’t care if it’s D&D or World of Warcraft (Which sucks just as much) or any RPG, you need to take a stright edge razor and end your life now. Losers.

While I am at it, here is a list of other “Geek” things, that are overrated now.

1.Monty Python and the holy grail. Funny movie, but quoted ad nasuem. Find a new movie to quote.

2. The Evil Dead. The first movie is boring as fuck. The second one alright and Army of Darkness, watchable. The ONLY thing these movies had going for it was the direction of Sam Rami and the acting of Bruce Campbell.

3. Not sure what should go here, I attacked most everything, except Star Trek, and trust me trekkiees, you’re NEXT!

This is the end of this little diatribe…for now. I will update it from time to time with things I may have left out in my attacks. Geeks and fanboys are safe, for now

Essays, Non-fiction, Opinion, retro, Woman, Writing

OMG, BARRACK OBAMA IS GAY? (2009)

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Oh, my God;Did you see that Adam Lambert just admitted he is gay? I don’t believe it.

So ends another vapid exchange between two lesser beings, also known as American Idol fans(I apologize to my great friend, who happens to be smarter then the average American Idol fan, but still enjoys the show.)

America needs to get over its gay obsession. Guess what? gay’s are not new, they have been around as long as humans have. Stop pretending like they are the new toy you just got for Christmas, and awing over them.

I had to check the calender today to see if it was 2009 or 1996…you see, thirteen years ago, a celebrity–hell, anyone really–coming out the closet might have been a major shocker. Now its old hat.

Oh my God, did you know [insert celebrity name here] is gay? The right response to this question is “Who gives a fuck?”

Hey, did you know so and so is straight? That might be more of a surprise in a nation is that slowly becoming gayer and gayer.

Hell, this country seems to have such an obsession with gays that Sometimes we know you’re gay before you even do.

Hey America! If you love gays so much, why don’t you marry them? Oh, thats right, because we’re still a nation of homophobes. Our obsession with gays is more that of an anthroplogist, studying the tribe.

“The gays, they act like real people…astonishing!” “They feel, just like us.”

What an incredible discovery we made;Gays are human, go figure?

and enough with this bullshit phrase “I came out of the closet” it is so cliche. So many gay people “come out” of it on such a daily basis, that one has to wonder; is it a closet or a fucking clown car?

Gay’s and Clowns have a lot in common;both wear obscene amounts of glitter and make up, both are bedecked in outrageous outfits and apparently you can fit shit loads of them into small, dark, tight spaces.

Thats right, I just compared homosexuals to clowns, get the fuck over it.

We need to go back to don’t ask, don’t tell. Because who you fuck is none of my goddamn fucking business. How is knowing the EMT–who is saving your life– takes it in the ass on a nightly basis from his boyfriend going to change who he is as a techinican? So long as he is compentat at what he does, that is all that matters.

No more “gay pride” prades. Guess what? The majority of Americans couldn’t care less you’re here, you’re queer and you’re proud. What I give a shit about is that your fucking parade is holding up traffic.

I’ll vote agasint gay marrige, just on the fact you made me 15 minutes late to my goddamn appoitment.

Another thing, stop comparing this “gay rights” bullshit to the civilrights movment of the 60’s. They are not one and the same thing.

You didn’t see headlines in the 60’s read “Louie Armstrong says “I’m black” did you? It must of been a real shocker when Sammy Davis Jr came out as well.

“Boo hoo, we can’t marry” How would you like a special bubbler(water fountain) that says “Gay use only”?

Oh, thats right, we don’t segerate strights and homo’s, do we? and even if we did, it isn’t as if you could hide it like the blacks could hide there skin color, right?

“but people shouldn’t have to hide who they are” blah blah blah, SHUT IT! The world isn’t perfect, it is the way it is, and you have to make the most out of your life with what you’re delt.

You don’t see me running around yelling out how stright I am, do you?

Do I hog up traffic with stright pride prades, marching giant plaster of paris vaginas up and down the street to show the world how much I love pussy, do you?

Why is that? Because no one gives a shit.

You decide to “come out” you deal with the reactions you get. Its like yelling “fire” in a crowded building,there is going to be a reaction.

I guess what I really wanted to say is this: Being gay is no longer news;stop wasting ink and trees on how the next American Idol winner is queer. Because no one really gives a shit…except for the tweengirls whose hearts you just crushed because the Backstreet Boys are fags.

Well, thats the end of this lengthy diatribe;so much more I want to say, but maybe I’ll save it for a extended version or a part two.

Essays, Non-fiction, Opinion, retro, Writing

Against PC Culture (2008)

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The best thing about America is that I never run out of targets for me to verbally assault with my diatribes.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/Movies/08/12/shriver.thunder/index.html?iref=mpstoryview

This retard wants people to not see Tropic Thunder because they use the word Retard too much and it’s hurtful to…well, retards, much like Mr. Shriver here.

First off, I highly doubt the retards are a big part of the movie going public…wait, scratch that. I need to rephrase this, because well, 90% of this country is retarded and a lot of them are the movie going public, hence why Hollywood spews forth shitty remakes and crappy movies year after year.

Revised: I highly doubt that the “Mentally Challenged- there we go, that is specific to the type of people I want you to in vision while reading this.- are a big part of the movie going public, and I wonder why?

Most probably would not even get the plot of anything that requires more intelligence then a sight gag. The type of movies that would be more suited to the mentally challenged would be something along the lines of “Meet the Spartans” “Scary Movie 4” “Epic movie” “Date Movie” and the new “Disaster movie” which is a most appropriate title given the line of crap movies that came before it.

The mentally challenged probably won’t go see Tropic Thunder unless they go with a non mentally challenged friend or family member.

Why should I, as a fan of the stars of Tropic Thunder (Although some may argue being a Ben Stiller fan may make me a retard) not see this movie because it’s offensive to some? It does not offend me, and the entire side of my mothers family is retarded, baring her, of course.

I watched the Klumps and laughed my ass off, and some could say thats offenive to the fat fucks out there. I really don’t give a shit. Guess what, the joke isn’t being made about me, so there is no reason to get upset. Same for you retards out there. The joke isn’t being made about you, so GET OVER IT!

Mr. Shriver even says we should “Ban” the movie. Wow, a fascist statment coming from someone who, in my opinion, looks like a Republican, latent homosexual, Mormon, wife beating, alcoholic, douche bag. Shocking!

Once again I point out the first admedment. Is it that fucking hard to understand? It protects all speech, weather that speech is popular or not. You don’t have to like it, and you can use your free speech to say you hate it as well. To suggest banning the movie, as well as the word “retard” is just dumb.

You make the argument that people could use those lines and make fun of the mentally challenged, well sure they could, but that’s what is so great about the first amendment, is shows you who the real douche bags are, much like Mr. Shriver.

Mr. Shriver, take your PC loving, leave it to beaver style ass and cram it. Take your victim act somewhere else, because no one else gives a shit.

A movie is a movie, and what people take away from that is up to them. I will not delve too much into this topic given that I have done so in the past, but man do these douche bags piss me off.

P.S. Wow, a whole rant on retards and I didn’t once make a joke about how the country is run by one…whoops, just did. 😀

Books, Essays, Non-fiction, Opinion, Philosphy, Review

The Way of Men (Book Review 2012)

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Having just read The Way of Men by author Jack Donovan, I have come to the conclusion that my idea of masculinity has been wrong all these years.
Strength and masculinity have been considered, for years, abstract concepts. That is to say, everyone has their own interpretation on what makes men, men and they are whitewashed hypocritical versions of masculinity to borrow a phrase from Anton LaVey.

Men will often refer to gangster movies as the ideal man movies but in reality, suggest that being a man is something completely different.
In The Way of Men, Jack posits the question of what masculinity is and if there is indeed a true way to BE a man and if indeed there is a true way to be a man, then what is the way of man?

The Way of Men is suggesting that manhood is the way of the gang. Men, traditionally being the hunters of the tribes would naturally have to get along to succeed and keep each other and their tribe alive.
This traditionally makes sense, especially on a Selfish Gene scenario. With Richard Dawkins suggesting the cost benefit scenario that all males of various species adhere to by nature.

Mans true nature is to be territorial, aggressive, dominant, strong and strategic, even to the point of being thieves and going so far as to steal wives from competing tribes. Yet men can also be compassionate and fair.

Men are born with the desire to compete for resources and as horrible and vulgar as that sounds to reduce woman to resources that is the way it has been for centuries. It was the way evolution intended it and the way our human biology still sees it.

It also seems to be suggesting and I could be wrong, but crime, in the traditional sense is really men being locked up for being, well, men.

It is not suggesting a release of prisoners or anything of the like but rather just suggesting that we lock men up more often for being themselves.
It is the fact that society no longer needs for men like that, that leads to frustrated young men turning to drugs and other avenues, often leading to criminal activity for lack of ability to express their true natures.

The Way of Man can be seen as a call to action. For young men to grab society by the balls in only the way men can and assert ourselves to not be breed out of extinction. We must reclaim masculinity and not make our young men feel demonized for their natural predictions.

Men are a completely natural thing and if we allow ourselves to, we will be destroyed.

So then I pose the question: What is the future way of man? The answer is the way of the dinosaurs.

Five out of Five Stars.

Essays, National, Non-fiction, Politics

Bernie Sanders is Hitler!

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In order to understand what I am about to lay upon you, one has to have an understanding to how things were in the past. Ideology of old in the past, doesn’t mean it is currently seen the way it once was. Libertarianism, in the past, was once traditional conservatives. Oddly enough, in today’s epoch, it is now associated with Liberal ideology. Even more oddly, it is sadly becoming associated with the Alt-Right, which is absolute is not. In fact, the Alt-Right is closer to FDR New Deal liberals than they are to the traditional right and this is where we get into the gist of my essay, Bernie Sander’s is Hitler!

If you never read Mein Kampf, which you absolutely should have, if you want to consider yourself educated. Most of the book isn’t in any way, shape or form what one would consider an anti-Semitic rant. In fact, Mein Kampf is combination Biography, political manifesto and interjected opinion as opposed to a plan for the elimination of the Jewish people that it was always considered by the uneducated plebeians, that is the modern right and left. In reality, Mein Kampf is closer to your drunk lefty uncle Fred at Thanksgiving, ranting about the inadequacies of capitalism and why the rich are responsible for all the woes in the world. Sound familiar? It should, given that is Bernie Sander’s entire base and style. He’s sticking to basic structure of any leader, if you also bother to read the 48 Laws of Power!

The fact of the matter is, Hitler was an anti-capitalist, anti-communism, Boeheim artist, who traveled from place to place, never really doing much of anything and grew bitter and bitter by the day for finding no success. Being a product of his generation, and not as liberal as he claimed to be toward the Jews in Mien Kampf! In other words, Hitler was Jack Dawson in Titanic, who harbored hate towards most people, in fact, I would say Hitler was closer to being misanthropic than anti-Semitic, he ended up taking it out on the Jews for a number of reasons, some of which would include Anti-Semitic behavior was common in Germany seventy years ago, as with most nations. In fact, Jewish hated was very common in other ancient epochs as well. Some Jews actually were trying to install Communism in Germany, he reacted in order to stop it. There were some Jewish 1 percenters, to borrow a phrase from Sanders and Friends. Ultimately, Hitler saw himself as the hero an acted that way, he was Germany’s savior and nothing was going to stop his seemingly God given mandate to save Germany!

(As a quick digression, Hitler also seemingly had either a God Complex or Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Entitlement issues, typical human superiority issues, based on superficial, non-objective criteria. Among a plethora of other mental issues. None of which he shares with Bernie Sanders. Interestingly enough, Bernie seems to have no mental issues, which makes this parallel worse!)

Back to Bernie Sanders, both share a similar ideology and are very much old school, big government Democrats, pandering to the working class and working for you. Bernie was seemingly influenced to get into politics as serious study, because of Adolph Hitler himself, being quoted as saying, Because Hitler won an election that was way he took politics so seriously. Had he bothered to read and pay attention, he would know that Hitler never won an election. He lost and seized power. Also, he would know that, besides having old school leftist tendencies towards racism, Bernie and Hitler were ideologically one and the same, pandering to the same base (National Socialist Workers Party ring a bell?) with a similar style, neither one of which ever amounted to much, outside of politics and ultimately both Bitter and perpetual victims of a mean spirited, capitalistic system!

I personally believe, given the opportunity, Bernie would march the successful into death camps and redistribute their wealth in quite the same way. The leeches had always been around, looking to suck from the strong and those who dare attempt to make something of themselves in our society, and Bernie is leading the charge!

In conclusion, based on facts, Bernie is closer to Hitler than any candidate, past or present, including Donald Trump.

(Disclaimer, I begrudgingly voted for Barry Goldwater’s doppelganger Hilary Clinton, on the fact that she was, ironically, more conservative!)