Tag Archives: Writing

Writing

Kageoween: Terrifier 2

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INTRODUCTION: I’m only doing the one review this year for Kageoween, because there isn’t much out there for horror at the moment that really entices me, I saw IT part 2 finally, it’s basically the same movie as part one and sucked. I saw a few other films, none that great. I think next year will have more for me to bother with. So Even though I never seen the first one, I’m going to review Terrifer 2.

PLOT: Stephen Kings IT meets Captain Spaulings mute brother.

CHARACTERS: Kinda weak. They exist as mere fodder for Art the clown.

ACTING: pretty solid

DIALOGUE: soild.

FX: Very good

SUBTEXT: Tutti Fuckin Frutti is still relevant 20 years after the fact, apparently.

CONCLUSION: This movie is more unique than I originally thought. Originally I didn’t bother checking out one or two for years because the overall premise seemed cliched. The kills are a mix between brutal and classic horror, the film is well shot and it has a bunch of classic homages to 80s horror films. However, while interesting the movie is still flawed, not really having a plot at all weakens the movie, even if the horror parts are similar to other iconic slashers of the past 40 years, like Freddy and Jason, at least they had some story. It’s mostly just gruesome imagery for shock value and little more, but still, that’s kinda its charm as well.

3 out the 5 stars

Writing

Evil Dead Rise, a Movie Review

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INTRODUCTION: I was going to review this for Kageoween, but it sucked so bad that I said fuck it and am reviewing it now.

PLOT: The Deadites return but in New York or some shit.

ACTING: It works, not the worst I’ve seen, but still pretty bad.

DIALOGUE: Not cringe, so it has that going for it.

CHARACTERS: Crap. not even stock. Pretty much relies on making you sympathetic by going after children.

SFX: only ok

SUBTEXT: zero

CONCLUSION: This movie wasn’t needed. It was worthless. I never saw the remake from 2013, but pretty sure that was less worthless than this. If you ever thought Bruce Campbell wasn’t a much needed part of this franchise, this movie might change your mind. It’s mindless, midcard horror and dumb as fuck. Really wish I never bothered watching.

1 star out of 5.

Writing

The Rise and Fall of Vince McMahon, a review of Netflix’s Mr. McMahon.

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INTRODUCTIONS: Let’s get two things out of the way before I begin this review. First, I had a micro investment in WWE in 2014, having bought stock. About 25 shares total. I sold those stocks in November the same year, due to ineptitude of the industry. Second, My entire family, going even back to my late grandfather, all loathe McMahon with a passion, so we’re highly biased. I have no doubt that all the allegations were true and hopefully him and everyone involved get what they deserve in court. That said, this documentary isn’t without flaws from the beginning.

WRITING: Fine

VISUALS: Fine. It’s a documentary, not much to deal with.

EDITING: Swamy and misleading.

CONTENT: Worthless. It’s billed as being about Vince, but is an an unstructured mess that deals more with wrestling in general than the subject matter.

CONCLUSION: This thing is plagued with Swamy Micheal Moore style editing from the beginning. This automatically brings into question its journalistic integrity. They quote-mine and edit things out of context to make certain people or peoples look worse than it is. Bill Simmons is no better than McMahon is with the way he edited this documentary to favor his anti McMahon bias. Which, while I share his bias, still think it’s a disingenuous thing to do. Mind you, this is the problems with this “series” from episode one and I’m only 20 mins in and it’s insufferable.

This doesn’t really know what it wants to be. It wants to be journalism, but fails. it wants to be about its subject matter, but fails. it wants to be about wrestling, but fails. It stacks the doc with ass kissing McMahon sell outs, whilst being a hit piece at the same time. Billy Simmons is proven incompetent as a director and we’re no better off for see this documentary. Maybe in the future, someone could do a legit piece and have it make sense. Perhaps Netflix would have been smarter to have sold this to McMahon and let him destroy it.

2 out of 5 stars

Writing

Ghostbusters 4 1/2: Frozen Empire movie review.

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INTRODUCTION: So I waited a bit to see this movie until the BS died down, much like with the 2016 Ghostbusters. I think it’s helpful, especially when approaching a movie you loved for decades.

PLOT: The New Busters move back to NYC and fight a new big bad.

CHARACTERS :Very good and very well developed. Even the introduction of new characters is interesting. Pecks characters change is intriguing and interesting.

ACTING: excellent! Everyone brought their a game here.

DIALOGUE: Very well done.

STYLE: Excellent!

FX: Awesome. The mix of CGI and Practical work so well.

SUBTEXT: None. Regardless of what some people seem to say on the internet about an interpersonal relationship between one of the characters and a ghost be more than friendly ain’t there either.

CONCLUSION: Very slow burn of a movie that sets up a lot of interesting characters and equipment for a third installment. Gil Kenen did an amazing job with this movie and it made it Al the better. I very much look forward to a third installment.

4 out of 5 stars.

Writing

Fireball Wiskey BBQ

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Remember this in The 40 Year Old Virgin?

Well, apparently the good people over at Fireball decided it needed to be a bbq sauce flavor. It taste smoky, cinnamon flavored with a hint of booze and pepper. While I can discern all three, it’s hard not to notice that the real discripton should read

“Warning, taste like that “girl” your frat brothers introduced you to, your freshman year of college and all you could remember the next day was thinking your mouth tasted of Virginia Slims, booze and big red chewing gum.”

To be fair, if you don’t use it as a dipping sauce, like I did and you put it on the food that you cook, it’s almost tolerable, given most the flavor burns off.

This video sums up how one should feel about it, not just the bad sex you had that night but the taste of this fuckin bullshit!

1 out of 5 stars

Writing

That 90’s Show

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INTRODUCTION: My like the predecessors, I wasn’t and still am not the core audience for this show. Both shows lean heavily on nostalgia for a decade that you were born into or grew up in. Being born in 1986 undoubtedly meant that I would end up having to watch That 70s Show at some point, as my parents grew up in the 1970s. Still, in spite of the weird 70s motif, it had a certain charm and was just pretty good. Red Forman and Hyde being the two best of the original cast. It gave that 80s show a tall order to live up to and it failed. Would this show be equally as weak?

CHARACTERS: Well you have a new cast and they obviously have the onus of living up to yesteryears characters. The original characters returns help make up for it. That said, these kids are not millennials. They lack everything that the reality of these people are. I mean, they have a “cool” kid hanging out with dorks. That’s not how that worked. Still, they keep the basic law breaking aspects of their boomer predecessors that’s the closest to a reality for being a millennial for these characters.

ACTING: Not bad. better that 80s show, not as strong as the original show.

SET: The original sets are spot on to the originals. too bad the attention to detail ends there as the brands are wrong.

FX: Still kinda dated to 90s tv sitcoms, but that’s kinda the point.

CONCLUSION: I’m not going to be shocked if this show meets the same fate as that 80s show. Ironically, this would have worked better as a show if they had turned it into a revamp of That 80s Show and ditched the 90s bullshit. For the right audience and by that I mean the everyday overly nostalgic millennials that miss that peice of shit decade. For those that never experienced the 90s, you’ll walk away with appreciation for being born long after that decade. for me, well the only reason to keep watching this is Red Forman.

3 stars out of 5